Ms. Itall

I miss you, even though you're mean and obnoxious. I miss the way you would kiss me and make jokes I didn't get. I miss the way you would make fun of my parking. I miss the way you would put food in the microwave and call it cooking (and believe it). I miss your smile, I miss your texts, and I miss not watching movies with you. I miss making you hold my hand while you drove and picking on you about littering.

But mostly I miss the way you used to put up with my crazy ass.

I'm not the easiest to deal with all the time, but I'm worth it.
And in the end, you're the one missing out.
but I do still miss you....

If I have a question, you have a problem.

When a boy ends a relationship with a girl, the girl wants to know why, and she wants to know more than why. How could he do that? Why did she deserve it? What did she do? How can she fix it? Why wont you talk to her? Why are you acting like a jerk? What else could she have given you? Did you cheat? Are you lying?

But the truth of the matter is, what are we going to do with this information once we get it? Asking these questions is really just a way of dragging out the inevitable post-break up silence. We hope that if we force our presence upon these guys that they will see what they're missing.
But deep down we know that we're really just being a hot mess and that he does not want any of this.

I can openly admit that while I'm writing this I'm thinking of some way to text my now "ex" boyfriend and pester him into telling me why he broke up with me even though I don't know why I should even bother. I know it's pointless. I know I won't like the answer he gives me, no matter what that answer is.

Admittably, every situation is different. For example, in my case he didn't cheat on me (that I know about), but he didn't nicely break up with me either. The whole adventure has been him being mean to me for no reason. I've yet to understand why (and that, of course, is one of my many questions).
Some girls are good at moving on and simply thinking "well, I guess he just doesn't like me anymore."
But as we established in my last post, I'm bat shit crazy.
Because I'm a very pretty, (usually) nice, funny, fun, crazy (the good kind as well), easy going, up for anything type of girl. I strongly believe that if I've given a guy everything I have then he should damn well be content. And if he's not? Well then we have a mother 'effin problem. I will not rest until I know what I've done to upset you so much that you feel the need to completely disengage in conversation with me. You don't "want to be friends" or "f*ck buddies" you completely want to cut off contact.
I'm to cool for that!

So I'm on a mission to understand this, and it will undoubtably end in me hysterically crying and drinking night time cold medicine to fall asleep.
Oh, the joys of being a female.