Sitting On The Floor

You control my emotions. Hold me tight. I wish that I didn't need or want to wish for anything. That feelings could be easy again. A simple tug and pull at the heartstrings. But no, I have to feel this rush.
Do you happen to feel it to?

I need to cry. These tears well up inside me but I can't seem to push them out. Part of me wants to hang on to them, to stand strong. I don't need you I tell myself. I have to believe that, because what if you don't need me? Where do I stand then?

Life gets so high when your around, whispering lovers words into my ears. But then I take the swiftest fall at any sign of weakness on your part. I need you to pull me up, and you need me to pull you up, so here we sit. Staring doe-eyed at each other while sitting on the floor.

Are you toxic to me, do you think? I'm told I can do better, be better. But no one will give me the chance to even be worse. It's expected. I'm protected by their fear. Well fuck their fear.
I want to live.